February 20, 2011

Female: "Is that the little stick you pound meat with?"

Male: "Yes, it is the meat hammer."
Couple discussing what a meat tenderizer looks like.

February 18, 2011

female: "I swear i need to learn how to swallow."

male: "Did it miss your mouth and roll down your chin again?"

female: "No i choked."

male: "Did you take it too deeply again?"

female: "It went down the wrong hole."

male: "It may have been the wrong hole, but for a split second it was oh so right."
Female conversing with male about choking on buttered toast

February 17, 2011

"I looked at his unit today."
Male coworker to two other male coworkers in reference to fixing another male coworker's CD lamination machine.

"Aren't you glad he spreads it? He taught me too!"
Said by mom to daughter talking about how her son teaches women how to start fires using a fire starter.

"You should come to me."
Comment made by a lady to a man concerning travel.

Feburary 10, 2011

"I'm picturing myself on my hands and knees in your cube"
Male coworker to male boss